Fifty shades of distorted, objectifying, dysfunctional sex

Fifty Shades of Grey by E.L. James was published over a year ago in June, 2011. More than 40 million copies have been sold worldwide since. And recently I thought, I’m probably a little late jumping up to tell women to avoid getting sucked into this mess of a series.

But in exploring this pornographic epidemic that’s hit American women like a ton of bricks, I found out that Universal Pictures has secured the rights to create a movie trilogy.

Trilogy?! This news made me sick and it has lit a fire under my behind to stand up to readers of this series & remind them of the horrific effects of porn on women, their husbands, and their families.

There is absolutely no denying that Fifty Shades of Grey is pornography.  If you care to debate that, I invite you to comment. Even a single paragraph justifying its definition is completely unnecessary. You’re kidding yourself if you want to think otherwise.

So what’s so bad about hopping on this bandwagon?

From The Effects of Pornography on Individuals, Marriage, Family, and Community:

  • Pornography changes the habits of the mind, the inner private self. Its use can easily become habitual, which in turn leads to desensitization, boredom, distorted views of reality, and an objectification of men & women alike.
  • Viewers (readers, in this case) of pornography assign increased importance to sexual relations without emotional involvement, and consequently, married readers experience decreased intimacy with their spouses.
  • Exposing a child to pornography within a family setting causes stress and increases the risk for developing negative attitudes toward nature and the purpose of human sexuality. Their sexual expectations and behavior are shaped accordingly and their sexual self-esteem is lowered.
  • Pornography users increasingly see the institution of marriage as sexually confining, have diminished belief in the importance of marital faithfulness, and have increasing doubts about the value of marriage… leading to increased infidelity, separation & divorce.
  • Research shows that emotionally arousing images imprint and alter the brain, triggering an instant, involuntary, but lasting, biochemical memory trail which forever negatively impacts a person’s perception of sex.

So…

Wives, what are you saying to your husbands when you would prefer to read about and be aroused by dysfunctional, unrealistic, objectifying sex than spend time having authentic, intimate, loving sex with your spouse?

Mothers, what are you teaching your sons and daughters about sex and love when they see you reading this, and worse, when they pick it up to read themselves?

Young women, what are you telling men about the value of your dignity and the respect you deserve, when you read “literature” that glorifies sexual abuse and surrender of self-respect?

Beautiful women of God, what are you telling your Creator, who made you holy and perfect, by submitting to your base pleasures and drugging your mind to objectify yourself and others?

Fifty Shades of Grey is a real problem. And the solution is recognizing and restoring the real dignity of sex.

Sex is a God-given gift designed to bring new life into the world! Sex is our hope for future generations. Sex is for marriage, a bond which protects children who are the fruit of intercourse. And faithful, conjugal sex channels the giving and receiving of sexual pleasure in a way that builds up rather than tears down society. It is good and it is sacred.

It is not meant to be disgraced by books like Fifty Shades of Grey.

So my challenge is this: destroy your copy of this book. Don’t donate it to plague another woman’s life. Burn it, trash it, shred it.

Then, stand up to other women reading it and share the truths about pornography and the pain it causes.

Then, pray for every failure of the movie trilogy and do everything you can to prevent its success, at least among your own girlfriends…

Because sexual integrity is precious to protect.

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12 thoughts on “Fifty shades of distorted, objectifying, dysfunctional sex

  1. Well said! Last week I was notified by the public library that I would be able to download a copy to my nook. I wanted to see what the craze was all about, and wasn’t about to pay for it, so I signed up at the library. I didn’t even get to the sex part of the story before I was completely disgusted by the tone of the book! The way that the main male character speaks to the main female character was disgusting and appalling. I fear for our society since many women have looked at this book with any sort of joy or entertainment. Great blog post!

  2. A good analysis of pornography, but you missed the point of the novel: “fifty shades of gray” is a term used by perverts to refer to relativist sexual morals, e.g., there is no right or wrong, white or black, when it comes to sex, only different fetishes and perspectives, shades of gray.

    And a warning to Catholics: Don’t be fooled by false teachers claiming that the Catechism’s definition of pornography allows you to watch or read pornography, because spinning Catholic Doctrine isn’t the same as living according to Catholic Doctrine. In short: Be chaste!

    • Thanks, Nick. Good thoughts! I didn’t aim to miss the ‘point’ of the novel. Its title just wasn’t something I chose to focus on. However, your point is good. Gray is the devil’s favorite color, after all.

  3. I saw these putrid books at Target, and i could barely get through the first page. I don’t get what people see in them. It’s really sad what literature has come to, but at the end of the day, it’s all about the $$$ and what sells, and at whatever cost.

    Let’s hope any movie plans end up on the back burner indefinitely.

  4. Have you read the books? Or considered the points that are positive about these books?
    For one, Ana marries the first man she loves and yes, loses her virginity to him. Two, it is yet another example of people being able to change for the better. If Christian didn’t meet Ana, he wouldn’t have altered his character to be better. Christian learns to communicate effectively in the relationship by the second and third books. Is human growth something to be frowned upon? And finally, they are two consenting adults who have the right to do what they want. Neither is unwilling in their relationship, and both have the option to walk away from it. If this book were to objectify women wouldn’t she have been more so forced into the relationship?
    Consider reading the book before totally thrashing it.

    • 50 Shades… isn’t about “human growth” just as porn isn’t about the plain brown wrapper it once came in.

      Some things don’t have to be thoroughly consumed before one knows they are trash, poison even. Sometimes a mere whiff is enough. (Check your refridgerator.)

    • Thanks for your comment, Anna. I certainly cannot consider reading the book since I wholeheartedly believe it is in fact pornography and it’s not good to expose our hearts & minds to something so evil and addictive. A drug counselor can certainly affirm that cocaine is bad without ever having tried it; the same applies here.

      To answer your question about objectification. There are many people – women and men alike – who are objectified in this world without any or much force at all. In fact, many people are willingly objectified (e.g. porn stars). Simply because someone offers consent, it does not make them any less of an object.

      Certainly, there may be positive points to these novels, but none so great that they outweigh the disgrace of pornography. I hope you can see that the darkness of this book is black enough to drown out any light.

      • I believe everyone is entitled to their own opinion. I just have my personal opinions about it as you all do. I can understand where you guys are coming from. I was just trying to provide points you may not have considered because I believe everything should be considered before deciding on a concrete point of view. I personally like the book, but that’s just me.

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  6. I just refuse to read this dumb book…the closest to porn I am interested in is hearing Jon Hamm talk about Mercedes Benzes on those commercials. Tell me about the C Class Jon, Im all ears.

  7. Great post! My only advice is to be careful when you call for the book’s burning. Obviously people have visceral reactions to the very idea, but it is important to encourage others to realize the dangers a distorted view of sex can cause. And, as a self-proclaimed man of letters, it doesn’t take much reading anyway to know that it’s a pretty poorly written book.

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